+1 merc; +1 mouth

[ishotyouuu]

 



WHAT'S UP ALL YOU SEXY PEOPLE

My name's Kaiya, and I'm here with Wade Wilson from the Deadpool series. You probably already know who he is from the really awesome movie that came out two months ago, but just in case you haven't what the hell is wrong with you here's a little bit of context from his comic series: /deep breath 

Wade here's a mercenary-turned-failed genetic experiment from Weapon X, a scientific military program designed to create genetically enhanced living weapons. All Wade got out of the deal was a healing factor far more advanced than any normal human, so he can withstand any amount of pain, trauma or injury without dying from it. Sadly, all that invincibility went to his head and he's kinda sorta really batshit crazy as a result of it. (That might just be the accelerated widespread cancer in his system, though-- did I mention his healing factor doesn't discriminate between healthy cells and cancer-ridden cells?)

He'll also be coming with memories from Haven, a horror game that ran from 2012 - 2015 (rip never forget) so expect a heapin' helping of PTSD as a result. Fun for the whole family! Speaking of which, his kinda sorta unofficially adopted daughter Clementine is here too, so you'll probably rarely see one without the other. Now, he does tend to enact horrible unspeakable acts upon the fourth wall (don't worry, they have an understanding) so I've put up this handy Permissions Post for people who wanna opt in/opt out of that.

I apologize in advance to anyone he's going to enrage with his rampant case of foot-in-mouth disease. 

Comments

[cashlin]

gross

[ishotyouuu]

I came here to have fun and I honestly feel so attacked right now ;;

[cashlin]

shhhh you have my love forever we both know this

now hold still while lilith sets wade on fire

[ishotyouuu]

too late, she's already inflamed him

me-ow

[cashlin]

NVM, GROSS

her heart belongs to her hero not-actually-her-boyfriend anyway buddy better luck next time

[ishotyouuu]

shot down again

ah well, not like he's not used to it

[cashlin]

there's plenty of mercs in the big multiverse sea, bb

[bloodbrine]

HELLA GROSS

hola my dude I played cousland the loser at haven way back when waddup

[ishotyouuu]

WOW I DID NOTHING TO EARN THIS ABUSE

I'm so excited to be in a game with you again! Wade's definitely gonna take special interest in this sexy badass pirate lady especially her ballistics hurr hurr hurr

please step on his face Merlwyb he will love every second of it

[bloodbrine]

Merlwyb has some gigantic cannons if you know what I mean





as in he is in the very real danger of getting a flintlock rifle in the face nbd

[ishotyouuu]

that means "I love you" right because that happens all the time

he's a total ladies man

[synthedick]

Hey there, Kaiya! I'm Grimme, and I play Nick here and one of the OCs - welcome to the game! I'm looking forward to watching Deadpool-related shenanigans and tagging him at some point. :D

[ishotyouuu]

OMG I LOVE NICK

please be the straight man to Wade's comic Mr. Valentine it'll be awesome and totally not a disaster at all

[synthedick]

He'll be the straight man, the sass master, and more. LET'S DO IT. ALL THE CR.

[ampliat]

Welcome to the game Kaiya!! I'm Sam and I play Blue here, Julia from the Magicians, and was just accepted with Laurent from Captive Prince. Really, though, there's no need to apologize for Wade. It's going to be epic.

[liquid_serpent]

Nice to meet you, Kaiya. I'm Linden and I've brought along Liquid Snake from Metal Gear Solid 1.

DEADPOOL! I love Deadpool and think he's awesome. I'd love to have Liquid, the posh-mannered British man meet Deadpool. Could be fun.

[ishotyouuu]

just don't ask Wade to have shirtless parties with you Liquid he ain't that type of guy

...uhhh maybe slightly that type of guy

[liquid_serpent]

Pffft, shirtless parties. That could be interesting. Who's got the biggest muscles competition.

[wavesoakedlegs]

...so he gets his original canon AND scarring experiences in a horror game combined into one beautiful mess? Oh boy. This will be a party for Wade Winston Wilson, then. 8')

(Oh uh WELCOME ALSO ENJOY YOUR STAY).

[ishotyouuu]

TO BE FAIR he's also taking memories from a sex game that I stupidly neglected to mention in my original post? So if nothing else he'll at least be more, uh... well-fed than he was in Haven. In every meaning of the phrase. *cough*

Thanks for the welcome! I hope to bring a lot of shenanigans to this game. XD

[wavesoakedlegs]

Well, I hope that was a happy time for him, HEM HEM. xD Shenanigans are kinda guaranteed tbh...

[born_this_wayne]

hi kaiya, excited to have you in the game! i'm mel and i play a jrpg hero (lloyd irving: tales of symphonia), an angry teenage werewolf (clifford norman: wilde life), and two child super heroes (thom creed: hero, damian wayne: dc).

thom sports his own healing abilities, and damian is coming in with memories from a previous game where he knew clem, so even though she won't remember him he'll definitely be keeping an eye on anyone clementine is close with, so i'm seriously looking forward to getting some cr with you.

i've heard nothing but good things about your deadpool from trace, this is going to be fun!

[ishotyouuu]

OH GOD WHY IS TRACE HYPING ME UP ALREADY D:

but yessss I await this CR-- Damian and Wade can side-eye each other into eternity because who are you and what are your intentions with Clem mister

[born_this_wayne]

BECAUSE YOUR DEADPOOL IS PERFECT THAT'S WHY

oh god don't give damian the "intentions" talk he will eye roll so hard his eyes fall out of his head.

[ishotyouuu]

HEY DADS GOTTA DAD OKAY JUST BECAUSE YOUR DAD DIDN'T WIN ANY "FATHER OF THE YEAR" AWARDS DOESN'T MEAN WE ALL GOTTA BE DEADBEATS

[born_this_wayne]

WOW WADE DID YOU STRAIN SOMETHING MAKING THAT LOW BLOW, DO YOU WANT TO BRING UP DAMIAN'S MOM NEXT OR IS THAT ONE TOO OBVIOUS.

[ishotyouuu]

wait your mom are you sure you don't mean your grandpa

jussayin' for a sexy young lady she does an awfully good David Warner impression these days

oh shit should he have put up a spoiler warning for that

[born_this_wayne]

Yeah don't bring up his grandfather either. In fact, new rule, no talking about damian's family at all, that way everyone can try to get along.

[ishotyouuu]

he actually knows jack squat about the DC universe so Damian's relatively safe

in fact he doesn't even know Bruce Wayne had a kid so that'll come as a surprise to him too

[born_this_wayne]

Lmao good luck finding that information out from damian either, wade.